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How do I know when I need Counseling?

There are many circumstances that may bring you to counseling. These can include:

- When things in your life aren't going as you'd like.

- When you are having persistent symptoms that disrupt your life, such as difficulties with sleep, fatigue, anger outbursts, significant weight loss or gain, excessive tearfulness, suicidal thoughts, any acts of self harm, etc.

- For support through any loss.

- When you have experienced a troublesome event you are not sure how to deal with.

- If you consistently have trouble dealing with events in your life.

- When you have experienced a traumatic event.

- When you continue to re-experience a past trauma.

- For personal growth and improvement.

- When you feel you have no one else to talk to.

How do I find a Counselor?

A good referral, from a trusted friend or family member is very helpful. If you don't know anyone to ask, your doctor can offer reliable referrals, or if you have insurance, your insurance company can direct you to counselors who will accept your insurance.

How do I know I have found a "Good" Counselor?

They should be licensed.

They should specialize in, and/or be experienced in, the area(s) you need help with.

Look for longevity  and consistency in their practice/partners/specialties.

They should belong to one or more professional organizations, like ACA, AMHCA, WMHCA, AAMFT, NASW These organizations require the counselor to adhere to a Code of Ethics. This provides some protection for you. 

Other important factors to consider are:

- Can they accept your insurance?

- Are they available the hours you need?

- Do they have experience in your specific age range (for children, teens and seniors)?

- What type of payments do they accept?

Finding a good fit may take a little work, but it will be well worth it.

What do all those initials after a counselor's name mean?

How do I know my Counselor Keeps up with Current Research?

All counselors are required to earn a minimum number of continuing education credits yearly in order to keep their license.

What does my counselor's membership in a Professional Organization mean for me?

This typically means they are voluntarily agreeing to adhere to a code of ethics, that they maintain professional relationships with peers, and they are more involved in their profession.

What does my Counselor's Outside Consultation mean for me?

Prior to licensure, counselors are required to have a more experienced counselor supervise their work. Once licensed, counselor are no longer required to obtain any supervision or consultation around their work. Counselors can seek outside consultation, which provides a way they can get feedback, continued education, support, and personal growth. This provides you with the knowledge and security that your counselor cares enough to continue to improve their knowledge and skills, and has an outside source to answer to for their counseling techniques. Statistically speaking, less ethical violations occur with counselors who are seeking outside consultation.

What if I don't like the counselor I choose?

A perfect fit doesn't always happen the first try, and you always have the right to go somewhere else. Changing counselors may cost a little more money, in that you have to pay for another intake session, where you have to answer the same questions all over again. And if you have been seeing your counselor for a while when you change, it will set back your progress to take the time to develop a trusting relationship with the new counselor. You will need to decide if it is worth changing.

If you find yourself uncomfortable with a counselor week after week, and your efforts to address your discomfort with your counselor do not appear to be helping, you may want to consider whether this is a poor match for you.

If you find yourself uncomfortable with just one particular session and want to quit entirely, it would be important to be honest with yourself if the issue that is pushing you away from this counselor is exactly the issue you need to be working on in counseling. One way to know is to talk to the counselor about your desire to leave. Often the response you get to this will either ensure you are in good hands, or you may need to look elsewhere. If you change counselors frequently then it would be a good idea to make one of your counseling goals to look at what is behind your difficulty committing to counseling or a counselor.

What should I expect from our first meeting?

Not much counseling will actually occur at the first meeting. The counselor will provide you with a disclosure statement which provides information about the counselor's education, credentials, experience and their rules around counseling, such as how long the sessions are (typically 45-50 minutes), when payment is due, what to do if you have an emergency, and information around confidentiality. This sets up the groundwork for future counseling sessions. The counselor should also collect information about you to get a good idea of who you are, what you have been through, where you want to be, and your goals. At the end of this session, you should be allowed to consider whether you feel safe and if this seems to be a good fit before you commit to continue.

What are the goals of counseling?

Your counselor should ask you that question in one of your first sessions, and you are the one to determine what you want to accomplish. Typically if you are experiencing symptoms of, for example, depression, you would want to alleviate those symptoms as part of counseling. But you can choose what it is in your life you want to be different as a result of your being in counseling. Some typical goals of clients I see in counseling are:

- Increasing your abilities to experience, regulate and express feelings;

- Decreasing any sensitivity to trauma triggers;

- Learning to recognize life patterns and alter them;

- Recognizing your needs and learning to self-activate to meet them;

- Building self-esteem;

- Improving the quality your relationships;

- Enhancing your ability to set, hold, and honor boundaries,

- Increasing your ability to meet your life goals.

You should go over your goals with your counselor on a regular basis to ensure you are both working toward the same end.

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Do you have other questions you would like answered? Please email me your question, and I will answer it for you, and add it to this list for others.  smurray@CounselingCenterofSpokane.com

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